Preparing for Marriage

Have you ever just wanted or imagined that maybe "the one" just might get dropped off on your doorstep one, and BAM! you have a spouse. Marriage is a serious and exciting step in one's life.  However I believe that we have a few misconceptions on how the relationship between a man and woman requires development and progress as a couple beforehand. We have to meet people, put ourselves out there, and be wise in the decisions that we make as we find our spouse. You might hear this called "dating", or an even older term "courting". That is the process and journey that we go through as we get to know others on a more personal level, with the ultimate goal of marrying.

In my class we discussed how in our modern day there is more just hanging out in groups, rather than dating. This is taking away the important step of getting to know another person. Often times we desire to get off easy with a date such as a movie. I am not saying that moving watching is prohibited, however, is it the best way to get to know someone. There are three requirements to a date. Planned, paired off and paid for. Planned suggested that there is a schedule of sorts for the time set aside and spent together. Women prefer to know, or be informed, beforehand, of what to expect during the date. This will allow her to dress appropriately for the date. Paired off means that there is a boy that is expected to spend the evening with a girl. The two are responsible for the other during the extent of the date. They are to take care of the other and make sure that they are enjoying their time, with the attention focused specifically on the other. Paid for suggests that costs and resources for the date are taken care of and provided for.

As we make these three requirements part of dates, we will be able to learn more about the other individual and the relationship will grow. Several dates are preferable in getting to know someone. A strong relationship requires more than what the world has taught u is sufficient; appearance. In a marriage there is a need for deep bonds, trust, sacrifice, care, intimacy, communication, friendship, love and so much more. These things do not come overnight, but with time. Just as one looks for someone, we ourselves need to be progressing as individuals and acquiring characteristics that will positively contribute to a marriage.

I recently spoke to my father and he shared some thoughts of his already seven married children. HE said, "Each of them are happy and successful. They were individuals that prepared themselves for marriage and were then able to find a wonderful spouse. They are happy." I believe that is the desire of every parent, that they can see that their children find someone that they are genuinely happy with. Speaking of what I have been told, and experiences of others, marriage is a wonderful thing. After all it was designed by God.  Let us each prepare ourselves for this important decision, and be courageous in the dating process.